It’s office party time – Office Party Etiquette

Office Party Etiquette – because you really do need your job.

Tempting though it is to tell your boss what a #*#B*ing bleep he is, that’s not the spirit of the season, and you probably want to have your job tomorrow . . . and the next day, particularly if you are planning to pay your holiday bills. You DO plan to pay your holiday bills don’t you??

Fine, fine.

So this week and next we will share so tips to navigate the tricky waters of Holiday Office Parties. Because Office Etiquette doesn’t stop at 5PM.

Tip #1: Do NOT, under any circumstances bring the guy/girl you shacked up with for the first time this past weekend, or worse, last night. This will seem blindingly obvious to most of my readers, but enough of you . . .

Here’s the scoop. That random hook-up and your office do not mix.

1. He/She is probably not nearly as cute as you remember (or don’t remember as the case may be).

2. He/She may not be the best behaved in public situations – remember his/her job is not at stake at YOUR office party.

3. He/She may not have that much interest in you – this one can sting the most – imagine, your office frenemy hooks up with your date. Really bad form and dare I say, bad office etiquette on behalf of your frenemy, but you brought in the fresh meat…. Your own fault.

4. He/She won’t agree to tell everyone that you’ve been seeing each other for a month and instead tells everyone about your sloppy kissing technique – you will be forever renamed “Soupy,” even by your boss. Promotion chance – for the guys, probably up; for the girls, decidedly down.

Tomorrow: what you CAN do with a copy machine and a pint of Tequila.

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Cubicle Etiquette – Annoyingly loud

So the question FREQUENTLY comes up, “Is my cubicle mate trying to drive me crazy, or is it just me?”

Okay, so actually most people ask that more like this: “My cubicle neighbor is such an (insert explitive here). He cranks his music up and I can’t concetrate. Should I contact Human Resources?”

WHOA! NO, do not start by contacting HR. First that makes you look like you can’t handle your own business. Second, your fellow cube dweller is 90% of the time simply oblivious. By assuming the worst, you are mentally gearing up for battle. Fine, play world of warcraft at home, but keep your latent hostilities OUT of the office my friend.

I’m not going into the biology of why we tend to assume the worst – survival instincts kicking in, etc. – but suffice to say, you are not being chased by a saber-toothed tiger, so put down that spear. You need to get a good visual to aid you in your cubicle etiquette lessons.

Office Etiquette – Office Conversations

So what happens when you mix old fashioned etiquette rules and modern office? Hopefully a more civilized workplace. If you wonder what appropriate an office conversation is, then consider reading the piece on office conversations. Part late nineteenth century etiquette guidelines and lots of common sense, Miss Mentor pulls some gems from the past and wonders if anyone today would care to try them out a second time – minus the servants.